Friday, May 1, 2015

I'm an introvert. And a mom. And it's hard.

Being an introvert is hard on you. Being a parent is hard on you. Being an introverted parent is exceptionally difficult and exhausting. I've always been an introvert and I've always known it. It's never really been a "problem" for me until I became a mom. If there is one thing I wish people could understand about me, as an introvert, it would be that I am NOT anti-social (although I may tell you otherwise if I am trying to get out of a social/community/volunteer type event). I just despise small talk (or women chatter) and social events make me uncomfortable. All of these introvert tendencies are exacerbated when you have small children and I was not prepared for it.

1. You are touched way more often than you want. I don't know any mom who could possibly say that they cuddle their children too much. But by the end of the day, I feel as though I legitimately have cuddled my children too much. Looking back through my day, there are very few moments where a small person is not sleeping on me, clinging to my leg and whining for Cheerios, or sitting on my lap reading "That's Not My Dinosaur" for the nineteenth time. By the time the boys are in bed, the last thing I want is anyone or anything (I'm looking at you, cats.) trying to get more cuddles out of me. I have been touched-out and need time to recharge. Away. From. Everyone. 

2. You will never ever ever ever be alone again. You're with your kids all day. Or you're at work and come home to your kids. Or you're with your kids and husband on the weekends. The only time I am truly alone anymore is on my drive to and from work. I have been known to volunteer to go grocery shopping at Wal-Mart. On a Saturday morning. Just to be somewhere I can blend into the crowd and not have to talk to anyone for an hour.

3. You will cherish the day your babies are not "new" anymore. When you have a baby, people come out of the woodwork and start appearing on your doorstep requesting to see baby. When you have 2 babies, the number of people who want to visit is overwhelming. Some of these people will bring food or help around the house and then leave after a short visit. A good number of these people will set up camp in your house and require constant entertainment for THE.WHOLE.DAMN.DAY. While hogging your babies. Don't think you can steal away with your babies and take a nap, either. They will still be there when you get up (probably helped themselves to some of your food stash and left dirty dishes in the sink as well) and then it will be round two of small talk and entertaining in your own home, which is supposed to be your haven and safe place! Babies do expire - it seems around the 12-week mark - and become old news (yay!).

4. Your phone rings way too much. Introverts and phone calls go together like peanut butter and green beans. Once I became a parent, I realized my phone was ringing a ton more than it used to. I used to be able to go weeks (not exaggerating) without a phone call and now I get several a week. It doesn't sound like a lot, but when the sound of your phone ringing causes a moment of panic and a rise in blood pressure as you decide whether or not to risk answering it... it's just exhausting. Please, for the love of God, just text me or e-mail me. And even then, don't expect a response from me right away. Or even same day. It's not happening unless you're really special.

I'm an introvert. And a mom. And it's hard. 

What do you think?

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